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G.I. Joe Retaliation decided to deprive the masses of D.J. Cotrona‘s abs so they could explore the bromantic tension between stars Channing Tatum and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. We don’t see why they couldn’t just kill two birds with three shirtless stones.

– It’s April Fool’s Day so don’t be fooled by everything you see on the Internet…which is actually good advice for everyday.

cory-monteith-glee– This season of Glee has been hard on all of us, particularly Finn Hudson, aka Corey Monteith, who has checked back into rehab for “substance addiction.”

– Monteith can learn a thing or two from rehab all-star Lindsay Lohan. After she finishes partying her boobs out in Brazil, LiLo will report to rehab where she’ll get as clean and sober as one can get while still taking Adderall.

– Legendary music producer Phil Ramone has passed away due to complications from pneumonia. He was 79.

Madonna may be a billionaire, but she’s not sharing a thin, red cent with her homeless, homosexual brother.

Chris Brown and Rihanna may be off again yet again, but at least Chris has “absolutely” learned his lesson about domestic violence. Thanks Law & Order: SVU!

– Hip hopper Drake was honored that Rosie O’Donnell thought he was “cute” until Rosie revealed she was talking about another guy named Drake who was on a show for tweens.

Justin Bieber‘s monkey was quarantined in Germany — presumably with Bieber Fever — after the pop tart failed to produce the necessary papers. Also, Justin Bieber has a monkey.

– We kinda wish The A-List: Amish Country was actually happening if only for the amount of Pennsylvania Dutch shade these queens would be throwing. Happy April Fool’s Day, kids!

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